I'm so tired. But, I figure I have more than the toxins making me tired. I started spotting last night and it's red now. I think af is showing her ugly face. Blech! And I'm preparing for a doozy this time around. I'm cramping like crazy right now. No wonder I've been craving that big ole steak from Sizzler the past couple days. I always crave red meat around time for af.
I told my chiropractor yesterday about the cleanse and my ankle. He loved the idea of my doing the cleanse. The doctor who developed the cleanse spoke at his school. He knows all about it. He said that he was glad I'm doing it and is really stoked that it's helping me. Especially with the 5.8 lb weight loss already this week. He also scolded me a little about my ankle. He said that I should've stopped wrapping it last Sunday and that I need to try really hard to not walk with a limp. It still hurts. He said that the bruising and swelling are gone, so I should still ice it at least once per day and try not to overdo it, but to walk on it as much as I can. We walked to work today, for the first time since I sprained it. It hurts. I'm trying not to limp, but it really hurts right now. I am glad it's much better now.
I think my working to be more positive is helping me. I also think I'm making progress. I decided to try not to say negative things about people anymore. It's hard sometimes just because it's my nature to be critical. My parents were, my college was. I notice some details that others never would. I try to be observant without being judgmental. But I always tend to think things like, "I would never wear that," or "that looks horrible on her," or "What a jerk! He had no right to say that!" I wonder if I can stop doing that? We'll see. I wonder how often I cross the line between making an observation and judging? And how many people see it as a judgment, even though I'm just observing? Sigh.
Anyway, I think I'm going to have B take me to Sizzler for dinner. I'm starving. The plan allows for a lot of food so that you're not hungry. I just haven't had much today and it's my own fault. I couldn't get moving this morning, so I only had time for chia and flax for breakfast. A banana for my snack, 3 1/2 slices of turkey and a big serving of spinach for lunch and a peach for my snack. Just for the record, I was supposed to eat a whole lot more than that. I'm such a slacker. I'm just tired. Maybe I can get B into bed before 11pm tonight. **Yawn**
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Day 3 of Cleanse
I had a miserable day yesterday. My head hurt like crazy, people were in my office who shouldn't have been and I couldn't get any of my thoughts straight. I just felt plum worn out.
I'm still reading the Lifeforce book. Last night, I stumbled upon a passage where Dr. McCombs said that if the candida problem is really severe in a person, they can get headaches, nausea and fatigue. Ok, it seems that's what happened yesterday. I slept like a log last night. I was so tired that at 8:30 last night, as I was reading the book, I fell asleep, woke up around 9:00 and couldn't figure out where my book was. I found it in the floor. Guess I had dropped it.
I'm feeling much better today. Only a slight headache this morning, which seems to be gone now. I'm still tired. Maybe I should go to bed a little earlier tonight. No water aerobics tonight, though. We have an appointment with our chiropractor. He changed from Tuesday and Thursday as being his late nights to just Wednesdays. If B and I didn't love him so much, we really wouldn't drive all the way to Draper in five o'clock traffic to see him. Now this? Grrrrr...naw, that doesn't bother me. It's actually better because when Biggest Loser and Smallville come back on, I'll have my Tuesdays and Thursdays to watch them! Providing we can get home from water aerobics in time.
I'm still reading the Lifeforce book. Last night, I stumbled upon a passage where Dr. McCombs said that if the candida problem is really severe in a person, they can get headaches, nausea and fatigue. Ok, it seems that's what happened yesterday. I slept like a log last night. I was so tired that at 8:30 last night, as I was reading the book, I fell asleep, woke up around 9:00 and couldn't figure out where my book was. I found it in the floor. Guess I had dropped it.
I'm feeling much better today. Only a slight headache this morning, which seems to be gone now. I'm still tired. Maybe I should go to bed a little earlier tonight. No water aerobics tonight, though. We have an appointment with our chiropractor. He changed from Tuesday and Thursday as being his late nights to just Wednesdays. If B and I didn't love him so much, we really wouldn't drive all the way to Draper in five o'clock traffic to see him. Now this? Grrrrr...naw, that doesn't bother me. It's actually better because when Biggest Loser and Smallville come back on, I'll have my Tuesdays and Thursdays to watch them! Providing we can get home from water aerobics in time.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Day 1
First day of my cleanse and how do I feel? Tired. But then, I was even more tired when I got up this morning. Why am I so tired? I mean, I slept well last night. Maybe I just didn't get enough sleep.
I was also very bloated this morning. Through the course of the day, however, my hands have gone down. I was able to get my rings on my left hand. I was having to wear them on my right hand because I couldn't even force them on this morning.
And it's my own fault that I haven't eaten. This cleanse allows for good food, and doesn't restrict portions. But, we didn't have time to prepare breakfast and I didn't have anything I could just grab and go with. So, I decided to have sort of a fast. I had 2 very small chicken breasts and a huge salad for lunch. I don't even have my snack with me. I broke down and drank one of my protein shakes that was in the fridge at work. It has sucralose in it, but I was starving. Hopefully, that won't mess me up too badly. I just needed some energy so that we can go to water aerobics tonight!
I've been reading the book that goes along with the cleanse. I'm fascinated. This doctor seems awesome. If this cleanse does as well as I think it will, I am going to recommend it to everyone.
Yippee for water aerobics! I'm so excited! I hope this place has a sauna. I need to sweat. I don't want the toxins to cause me to get a cold and sore throat.
I was also very bloated this morning. Through the course of the day, however, my hands have gone down. I was able to get my rings on my left hand. I was having to wear them on my right hand because I couldn't even force them on this morning.
And it's my own fault that I haven't eaten. This cleanse allows for good food, and doesn't restrict portions. But, we didn't have time to prepare breakfast and I didn't have anything I could just grab and go with. So, I decided to have sort of a fast. I had 2 very small chicken breasts and a huge salad for lunch. I don't even have my snack with me. I broke down and drank one of my protein shakes that was in the fridge at work. It has sucralose in it, but I was starving. Hopefully, that won't mess me up too badly. I just needed some energy so that we can go to water aerobics tonight!
I've been reading the book that goes along with the cleanse. I'm fascinated. This doctor seems awesome. If this cleanse does as well as I think it will, I am going to recommend it to everyone.
Yippee for water aerobics! I'm so excited! I hope this place has a sauna. I need to sweat. I don't want the toxins to cause me to get a cold and sore throat.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Relief and Excitement
I am starting the cleanse tomorrow. I ate whatever I wanted the past few days. I won't be able to have anything but lean meats, fruits and veggies for the next 8 weeks. No free meals, either. But, I need to do this because I must get control over my health.
I got a letter from my doctor on Saturday that I have IBS. My tests came back negative for Celiac. I'm so relieved! The numbers they need for a positive for Celiac is greater than 19. Mine was 2! Phew! Now, I have the daunting task of figuring out what my triggers are. If I have any trouble over the next 8 weeks, I'll know if any of the 3 things listed above cause them. Of course, it would be specific foods, like tomatoes or something like that. If tomatoes is one of my triggers, I will be sooooo sad because I love tomatoes.
We have a great exercise plan. We'll be doing water aerobics at Sorenson on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. On Tuesdays, we'll do deep water aerobics at the one at the U. On Fridays and Saturdays, we'll probably just go to the gym. I'll need to get in a sauna and sweat 6 days a week to keep from getting sick from the toxins leaving my body.
Goodbye cheese, bread and such. At least for a couple months. It was great! But, for the long run, it's necessary to go our separate ways. I'll be back, don't worry.
I got a letter from my doctor on Saturday that I have IBS. My tests came back negative for Celiac. I'm so relieved! The numbers they need for a positive for Celiac is greater than 19. Mine was 2! Phew! Now, I have the daunting task of figuring out what my triggers are. If I have any trouble over the next 8 weeks, I'll know if any of the 3 things listed above cause them. Of course, it would be specific foods, like tomatoes or something like that. If tomatoes is one of my triggers, I will be sooooo sad because I love tomatoes.
We have a great exercise plan. We'll be doing water aerobics at Sorenson on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. On Tuesdays, we'll do deep water aerobics at the one at the U. On Fridays and Saturdays, we'll probably just go to the gym. I'll need to get in a sauna and sweat 6 days a week to keep from getting sick from the toxins leaving my body.
Goodbye cheese, bread and such. At least for a couple months. It was great! But, for the long run, it's necessary to go our separate ways. I'll be back, don't worry.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
How can you be sad and relieved at the same time?
It looks like we'll be taking a 6 month TTC break. Or will it be? We're not going to prevent, but I'll probably stop temping again and we won't pay any attention to when I ovulate. Whatever happens, happens.
Brent told me to lose a certain amount of weight before I get pregnant. That will take me 6 months. See, I either have IBS or Celiac Disease. Going to the doctor for my ankle gave me the opportunity to tell my doctor that I think I have IBS. He said it could more likely be Celiac disease. I was hoping to know this week, but I haven't heard from him. He'll be gone next week, so I won't find out for another week and a half. So, Brent wants me to get on this plan, called the Life Force plan. He says that he did it after having some major health issues for the first time in his life late last year. He said it really works. So, if I adhere to the strict diet (which is just a little more strict than the Celiac diet), and take the supplements to get rid of the Candida in my body, I should be preparing my body for weight loss and get rid of my digestive problems as well as my arthritis, fatigue and other stuff.
From my research, Celiac is related to miscarriages, IF problems and pregnancy problems. Blech!
I ordered the supplements yesterday. They shipped today. I should get them Monday. I go through 8 weeks of the diet and supplements and then Brent will do my bodyfat again. Of course, I'll be exercising during the program, so hopefully, I'll drop a bunch of weight during that time.
Whether I have IBS or Celiac, I will have to stick to a certain way of eating for my entire life. I can't go back. I can't slip. If I do, then I will have to deal with the pain and aggravation. So, I might as well get at it now. I'd rather not experience the pain and nausea and crap I've endured for the past year or two.
***IBS is a large intestine disorder. Celiac Disease is where I may be allergic to gluten. The small intestine's "fingers" that absorb nutrients may be damaged due to the toxins and stop functioning properly. It takes anywhere from months to years for them to heal after I would completely cut out gluten from my diet.
Brent told me to lose a certain amount of weight before I get pregnant. That will take me 6 months. See, I either have IBS or Celiac Disease. Going to the doctor for my ankle gave me the opportunity to tell my doctor that I think I have IBS. He said it could more likely be Celiac disease. I was hoping to know this week, but I haven't heard from him. He'll be gone next week, so I won't find out for another week and a half. So, Brent wants me to get on this plan, called the Life Force plan. He says that he did it after having some major health issues for the first time in his life late last year. He said it really works. So, if I adhere to the strict diet (which is just a little more strict than the Celiac diet), and take the supplements to get rid of the Candida in my body, I should be preparing my body for weight loss and get rid of my digestive problems as well as my arthritis, fatigue and other stuff.
From my research, Celiac is related to miscarriages, IF problems and pregnancy problems. Blech!
I ordered the supplements yesterday. They shipped today. I should get them Monday. I go through 8 weeks of the diet and supplements and then Brent will do my bodyfat again. Of course, I'll be exercising during the program, so hopefully, I'll drop a bunch of weight during that time.
Whether I have IBS or Celiac, I will have to stick to a certain way of eating for my entire life. I can't go back. I can't slip. If I do, then I will have to deal with the pain and aggravation. So, I might as well get at it now. I'd rather not experience the pain and nausea and crap I've endured for the past year or two.
***IBS is a large intestine disorder. Celiac Disease is where I may be allergic to gluten. The small intestine's "fingers" that absorb nutrients may be damaged due to the toxins and stop functioning properly. It takes anywhere from months to years for them to heal after I would completely cut out gluten from my diet.
Monday, August 18, 2008
I've Been Tagged!
Mandy tagged me! It took me a while, but I finally have some time today to work on this. Just having some fun!
Here are the rules:
1. Link to the person who tagged you
2. Post the rules to your blog
3. Write 6 random things about myself
4. Tag 6 people at the end of your post and link to them
5. Let each person you have tagged know by leaving a comment on their blog.
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is posted.
I'll try to think of 6 random things about myself.
1) I love to go whitewater rafting. It was my favorite thing to do until I almost drowned on a Class 4 rapid. I was in an individual ducky and something told me to not go down on my own, that I could tie it to a big raft and go down with them. Instead, I went down on my own and fell out at the bottom of the rapid. The force of all the water dropping so fast forced me down so far that it was dark. I saw my life flash before my eyes and it felt like someone lifted me out of the water to safety. Members of my group and the guides thought they would have a body recovery instead of a rescue. I defied odds and had a terrible headache for almost 2 weeks. I still love to raft, but freak out a little at the beginning of every trip.
2) I'm at home today, suffering from a badly sprained ankle and I think B wrapped it too tight. I'm having pains in my Achilles tendon.
3) I was raised with manners and to have respect for other people and their stuff. I don't go into people's houses and start going through their cupboards or playing with their belongings unless I ask first. I can't say that about many people that I know, especially ones who visited uninvited last night.
4) I have short legs. On my first date with Bryant, we went to Pres. Hinckley's 95th birthday celebration in the Conference Center. I randomly whispered to him, in the middle of the program, "My feet don't touch the floor." We still joke about that one. I'm strange that way.
5) I like to make up different words to songs to make them fit whatever I think about the song or a situation I'm in.
6)I love the water. Beach, lake, river - it doesn't matter. I love it. I'm like a fish. I'd swim everyday if it was convenient.
:) I don't have many choices to tag, but here goes - don't hate me:
Thoughts
Adrianne
Ani
Joy
Lisa
Carrie
Here are the rules:
1. Link to the person who tagged you
2. Post the rules to your blog
3. Write 6 random things about myself
4. Tag 6 people at the end of your post and link to them
5. Let each person you have tagged know by leaving a comment on their blog.
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is posted.
I'll try to think of 6 random things about myself.
1) I love to go whitewater rafting. It was my favorite thing to do until I almost drowned on a Class 4 rapid. I was in an individual ducky and something told me to not go down on my own, that I could tie it to a big raft and go down with them. Instead, I went down on my own and fell out at the bottom of the rapid. The force of all the water dropping so fast forced me down so far that it was dark. I saw my life flash before my eyes and it felt like someone lifted me out of the water to safety. Members of my group and the guides thought they would have a body recovery instead of a rescue. I defied odds and had a terrible headache for almost 2 weeks. I still love to raft, but freak out a little at the beginning of every trip.
2) I'm at home today, suffering from a badly sprained ankle and I think B wrapped it too tight. I'm having pains in my Achilles tendon.
3) I was raised with manners and to have respect for other people and their stuff. I don't go into people's houses and start going through their cupboards or playing with their belongings unless I ask first. I can't say that about many people that I know, especially ones who visited uninvited last night.
4) I have short legs. On my first date with Bryant, we went to Pres. Hinckley's 95th birthday celebration in the Conference Center. I randomly whispered to him, in the middle of the program, "My feet don't touch the floor." We still joke about that one. I'm strange that way.
5) I like to make up different words to songs to make them fit whatever I think about the song or a situation I'm in.
6)I love the water. Beach, lake, river - it doesn't matter. I love it. I'm like a fish. I'd swim everyday if it was convenient.
:) I don't have many choices to tag, but here goes - don't hate me:
Thoughts
Adrianne
Ani
Joy
Lisa
Carrie
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
If I Only Had a Brain
I had a lot of time to sit and ponder today at the dentist office. I had it all planned out in my mind what my blog entry would be. Now that I finally get around to posting, I can't remember a bit of it. And I thought it was pretty good, too.
If I had to guess, I would say it has something to do with...oh, let's see...nope, not the drill that was whizzing away part of one of my upper molars, nor was it the decay I had (yeah, that doesn't happen often for me), nor was it the fact that I have to go back and have the onlay finished on Saturday. Shoot, what was it?
Guess it wasn't that important. It was at the time, but now, I guess I've had my priorities restructured during the course of the day.
I think maybe a little of it may be coming back.
I was able to do some pondering last night as to what the deal is with me lately. The trip to Yellowstone was wonderful. We had a marvelous time and I didn't want to leave. I was so happy to be out of the city and in an environment where there wasn't much to upset me. It lasted until the end of last week. I started stressing again. On top of all that, I remember a couple doctors tell me that they thought I had IBS. I researched it and found that yes, I do most likely have it. I have all the symptoms. I've talked to a couple friends who have it and having it actually explains a whole lot. My job has been stressing me out for a while. That's making the IBS worse. And I had a perfect chart last month. WTH am I not pregnant?
I wondered if perhaps I need to change my attitude. I need to be more positive. I mean, I think I have been pretty negative lately. All this crap in my life just got me down. I mean, why did my SIL's pregnancy send me into a minor depression? Maybe I should be happy for her, despite the reservations I have that she can handle it and wondering why in the world does she get a baby so quickly when I've lost 3 in 32 cycles of ttc.
Anyway, I pondered and prayed. I had the distinct impression that if I can get a handle on my stress, it will solve most of my problems. I probably shouldn't flip out at everything that happens. Ok, so how do I lower my stress level? It really is getting out of hand. I haven't been myself in months. Not since the last miscarriage.
I MUST get back to the gym. I'm very weak right now from my IBS bouts. So, B and I decided that we're going to the pool and doing water aerobics tomorrow. That will give my body time to recover. I'm cutting the crap out of my diet. I'm calling Healing Mountain about regular reiki visits. And I'm going to start "sword fighting" B more often. (He has these "swords" he made that have water noodles on pvc pipe. It's fun). And yes, I need to take a few deep breaths before I flip out. And, add some regular yoga in there. I love yoga.
I wondered if I should find a new job. I started looking for other positions with the church yesterday. Last night, I felt that I should stick it out. I mean, overall, I really do like my job. It's just uber stressful right now because of not having a real leader. I got the impression that once they hire the new guy and he gets started, things are going to get so much better around here. All the crap will be cut out. So, I'm taking deep breaths and hanging in there.
If I had to guess, I would say it has something to do with...oh, let's see...nope, not the drill that was whizzing away part of one of my upper molars, nor was it the decay I had (yeah, that doesn't happen often for me), nor was it the fact that I have to go back and have the onlay finished on Saturday. Shoot, what was it?
Guess it wasn't that important. It was at the time, but now, I guess I've had my priorities restructured during the course of the day.
I think maybe a little of it may be coming back.
I was able to do some pondering last night as to what the deal is with me lately. The trip to Yellowstone was wonderful. We had a marvelous time and I didn't want to leave. I was so happy to be out of the city and in an environment where there wasn't much to upset me. It lasted until the end of last week. I started stressing again. On top of all that, I remember a couple doctors tell me that they thought I had IBS. I researched it and found that yes, I do most likely have it. I have all the symptoms. I've talked to a couple friends who have it and having it actually explains a whole lot. My job has been stressing me out for a while. That's making the IBS worse. And I had a perfect chart last month. WTH am I not pregnant?
I wondered if perhaps I need to change my attitude. I need to be more positive. I mean, I think I have been pretty negative lately. All this crap in my life just got me down. I mean, why did my SIL's pregnancy send me into a minor depression? Maybe I should be happy for her, despite the reservations I have that she can handle it and wondering why in the world does she get a baby so quickly when I've lost 3 in 32 cycles of ttc.
Anyway, I pondered and prayed. I had the distinct impression that if I can get a handle on my stress, it will solve most of my problems. I probably shouldn't flip out at everything that happens. Ok, so how do I lower my stress level? It really is getting out of hand. I haven't been myself in months. Not since the last miscarriage.
I MUST get back to the gym. I'm very weak right now from my IBS bouts. So, B and I decided that we're going to the pool and doing water aerobics tomorrow. That will give my body time to recover. I'm cutting the crap out of my diet. I'm calling Healing Mountain about regular reiki visits. And I'm going to start "sword fighting" B more often. (He has these "swords" he made that have water noodles on pvc pipe. It's fun). And yes, I need to take a few deep breaths before I flip out. And, add some regular yoga in there. I love yoga.
I wondered if I should find a new job. I started looking for other positions with the church yesterday. Last night, I felt that I should stick it out. I mean, overall, I really do like my job. It's just uber stressful right now because of not having a real leader. I got the impression that once they hire the new guy and he gets started, things are going to get so much better around here. All the crap will be cut out. So, I'm taking deep breaths and hanging in there.
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